Monday 4 January 2010

Compulsive eating

Not sure what is wrong with me (though I know my band is too loose and I'm getting a fill soon) but apart from that - I seem to be going crazy. I just want to eat and eat and eat. Not just food, but chocolate, junk, slider foods (chips, cheese and chocolate being my favourites)

I am trying, I really am, I start the day sensibly, I drink lots of water, I do ok till about 3pm, then I start to eat; and I eat for England. I don't pb (unless I eat sthg stupid too fast), but I eat and eat and eat and eat. . .

And I'm frankly terrified.

I dunno if it is a hormonal thing . . .or am I stressed? Or is it winter? Or depression?

Help!!! I've not eaten like this for a long time (like when I used to be obese)

I am trying all the standard things like keeping my hands busy, distracting myself, going for walks, baths, reading books, cheering myself up with other things, but heck, I dunno what is going on, I am eating everything in sight.

There has to be a reason; and I am going to find it, and whack it over the head. The weird thing is that my stomach often rumbles with hunger, so it's not like my stomach is full - it's sometimes empty (and a rumbly - tummy is not something that I have normallly experienced - yet the last ten days or so I feel it several times a day). Yet there is no way I need the food I'm grabbing. I would be embarassed to say what I've eaten today, so I won't.

But I'm going to sort this. Reductil (Meridia) here I come (if necessary, I'll try *anything* legal to keep my weight normal)

(No flames please!)

6 comments:

Barbara said...

Sigh.. I know how you feel.. no need to get those carbs out of your system otherwise you are on a cycle from hell.. your sugar levels are going crazy.. Have you tried to have all the legal foods at hands reach so when you get that urge you grab for them and not sweets? We had so many sweets in the house from the holiday that I finally had to just toss everything, it was too much temptation. Today was my first truly legal day back on plan (meaning no SWEETS). Wishing you luck..

THE DASH! said...

I guess what you're feeling is head hunger. Where the urge to eat is stronger than the urge to not! And it plain sucks.

I can't think of anything you're doing wrong. Can you go in for a fill - that would surely help. Other than that.. keep up that water intake. It's the only way I'm getting through too - I don't have much restriction and I'm hungry. But I keep busy and those numbers on the scale keep me from gorging. But believe me.. I do know where you're coming from. Been there, done that so to speak x

Bandster said...

I think you are right Barbara, it prob is a carb craving from all the junk that has been around the last couple of week.

I need to detox from junk and try to get back to protein and "plain" foods.

And yes, Cara, it is head hunger too. I guess Christmas can be a difficult time emotionally (hugs, you've had your share of that this year), and maybe that is why I am reaching for food I really don't need.

Back to square one. I am so thankful that I have a band. If I didn't I'd be so much heavier, with little hope of losing it.

Counting the hours (nearly!) till my fill

Dinnerland said...

I think that alot of the times when you are eating the wrong things, your body starts craving more and more.
Can you commit yourself to 2 days of ONLY protein shakes to get off the sugars, salts and fats and get back on track?
This has everything to do with physiology and nothing to do with your mindset or your will. Your body is driving you to have more of what you're pouring into it.!!

I hope this works, hang in there...

Dinnerland said...

I guess I just completely agreed with Barbara, above... by the way!

Bandster said...

Dinnerland, can you send me an invite to your blog (prettty please :-)) (bandster@ntlworld.com)

Thanks!